Blue Monday
by Andraia452
Summary: Leonardo and Donatello have a long overdue conversation about respecting one another. Donatello has been feeling unappreciated. Leonardo pays a visit to his lab to help ease the team tension. (Tumblr Flash Fic 002 - Regrets)


**Blue Monday**

Mesmerized at the reflecting cobalt dancing off reflective lenses, the jade turtle hesitated at the door. His hand hung in the air, prepared to knock on the ajar metal door.

The full-faced mask tilted slightly in his direction, acknowledging his presence. Words struggled to rise, but bubbled in his throat. He was sure he could hear an exasperated sigh as the mask was flipped up, flame still scorching steel surface.

"Can I help you with something, _Leo_?" The emphasis on his name let him know that his brother was annoyed.

Frozen as a statue, he remained steadfast at his post by the door.

Caramel eyes rolled at his lack of engagement, his arm continuing to stroke the canvas with the blowtorch. "Some time today, Leo? I have to complete this piece before thermal expansion sets in." Noting the blank cornflower stare, Donatello continued. "You know, heat both sides of this uniformly before it cools and becomes mis-shapen?" Another sigh and eye roll preceded his condescension. "Make the whole shiny thingie hot before it cools off and bubbles up. So-I-can-work-with-it."

Startled by the harsh sarcasm, Leonardo dropped his arm by his side. Biting back an equally snarky reply, he calmly reminded himself why he had come to Donatello's lab. Slowly approaching his brother, the forced cheerful casualness was evident in his vocal strain. "Whatcha working on?"

A third sigh, this time accompanied by a frustrated low groan. Thick, nimble fingers worked quickly to close two needle valves before turning off the next two. Leonardo watched in wonder as his sibling adjusted gauges until the pressure read zero, with the ease that he would use to execute kata.

He slid the heavy mask from his face, laying it on top of several pages full of scribbled notes and diagrams. "If you must know, I'm trying to re-build Metalhead." Flinching slightly into his shell, he tried to avoid the leader's inevitable disapproving glare. Scrunching a chocolate eye at his brother, he questioned, "You don't have anything to say about that?"

Leonardo rested his palms against the cool steel table, carefully perching on a cushioned stool. "What would I say?"

"Oh, I don't know. Something about how it's a waste of time, Metalhead can't be trusted, I should focus more on training and less on technology, I-"

"Woah, calm down, Donnie! I think Metalhead has proven himself a valuable member of this team. He did save us from the Kraang."

Fern lips scoffed, barely audible words struggling to surface.

The leader's brow furrowed as he rose slightly. "What was that?" He blinked, slowing his breath and replacing his firm tone with a kinder one. "I didn't come here to fight with you. I just wanted to discuss some things." He lowered himself once again, carefully adjusting to let the lip of his shell peek over the edge of the seat.

"Like how I'm not working fast enough or trying hard enough?" the purple banded turtle angrily spat.

Wide azure eyes gazed upon the younger turtle, confused. "What? Why would I -?"

"Let's face it, Leo. It's obvious you don't have faith in me or my abilities."

"Donnie, I never -" a tea green hand lifted in protest before being silenced by an incensed waterfall of words.

"You _never_? Try _always_! In fact, just the other day you doubted my calculations when I said the Nebula clouds could cover us." Embarrassed, he looked away. "They didn't, but that's not the point. I work so hard, but it's never good enough for you. You mocked me when I was trying to diffuse a Kraang bomb - an alien bomb! Do you have any idea how difficult that is? You block my efforts with April by always sending her off with Casey - alone - on missions."

"Hey!" Leonardo pouted. "I paired you with her to go look for Karai at the Comet Cleaners."

"Karai! That's another issue! How could you think I wasn't trying my best to save her?"

Blue bridged his middle fingers together, moderately pulsing them against each other. "I know she's not exactly your favorite person."

"But I know how important she is to Sensei." He laid a hand on Leonardo's shoulder. "And to you."

The older brother turned away so he wouldn't be seen wiping his snout. Donatello busied himself with some papers, pretending not to notice so the elder could maintain dignity. "It's not easy trying to make a cure for a disease that doesn't even exist on this planet. And then you throw a brain worm into the mix."

"I'm sorry, Donnie. I know you were trying your best. I was just a little ... frustrated with the whole situation." Watching his brother fidget with the papers - pinching the pages and release, like waves of tension, he knew something more was weighing on his mind. "Okay, out with it. What else is bothering you?"

He was ready to reply with an automatic "nothing," but followed Leonardo's vision to his crumpled paper pile. They were teetering the line between honesty and venting, but Donatello was sure this would greatly upset the balance. He slowly edged toward the precipice, whispering, "You really hurt my feelings."

He was encouraged with a rolling hand motion. "Go on."

"When you said you can't rely on technology and wouldn't listen to me about the Turtle Mech."

"That's because as your leader, you are supposed to follow my orders - without question."

"But you weren't even willing to give it a try. You say you rely on me for my technology and then don't support my choice of when to use it."

The bitter tinge was evident. "I think we all remember how the Turtle Mech worked out. Reaching down, he rubbed a phantom pain in his right leg. "And, as I recall, I suffered the brunt of that choice as well."

Guilt flickered in chocolate orbs. "I regret that day all the time. You were right. I should have listened to you."

Again, they were deviating from the purpose. Leonardo had no desire to re-live his greatest weakness, nor saddle his brother with such an unforgiving burden. He had wanted to make things right by his brother, to ease the growing tension between the two. "Well, the Mech did do a good job in helping to stop Mega Shredder."

He was rewarded with a small smile, but the younger's slumping posture told another tale. "Let it all out, Donnie. I want us to heal as a family, but I need to know what's on your mind."

The gentle inventor tried to restrain himself, but the dam had been broken and he was ready to release. "You put me under so much pressure! I don't know the solution to everything. I can't just immediately fix things because I'm the 'resident genius'. And yelling at me doesn't help."

He knew he had encouraged him, even pushed for honesty when his sibling had relented, but Leonardo couldn't help the crackling anger rising inside. "You're under pressure?! Do you have any idea how stressful it is to be the leader? To be the one responsible? In charge? If I fail, we all fail."

"You really have to stop with that martyr complex. That's the whole point of being on a team. It just wouldn't hurt to feel a little appreciated every now and then."

"Sensei once told me that as leader you can't expect gratitude for the position."

"But how about as your brother?"

Azure orbs softened. "You're right, Donnie. You are a very important part of this team. I'm sorry if I made you feel that I don't value your efforts. Truth is, we'd all be completely lost without you."

The visible gap was evidence of his genuine smile. "Thanks, Leo. We couldn't do it without you, either." He pulled his brother in close for a hug. Squeezing jade shoulders more tightly, Donatello's eyes watered as he felt a reciprocated grip.

"I love you, Bro."

Donatello leaned back slightly, prepared to re-iterate the statement. His brother's light green began blurring with lines of static gray. He quickly wiped at the tears stinging the corners of his eyes, becoming aware of reality once again.

Leonardo's tinny voice surrounded him, the echoes bouncing around the empty room. "Donnie, we need you out here - now."

Slow breath in. Slow breath out. Repeat. Once he felt composed, he reached for the knob of the Holoroom's door.

"I know that pretend time in your old lab is important to you, but the Professor thinks he may have located the Triceratons' ship. We need all hands on deck, ready for battle. Our time is running out. You wouldn't want to blow our chance at saving Earth and have to live with the regret."

An olive hand gently pushed the intrusive plastron away from his personal space. "No, Leo. We wouldn't want to have any regrets, would we?"


End file.
